Where did time go?

I can't believe the first month of the year is about to end. Time sure flies so fast! And I haven't even written about December and the first few weeks of January. There is just so much to share and journal about, a lot to be thankful for. The year 2006 was truly eventful, both happy and sad. I always tell myself that I can never trust my memory. I should start writing again. It's been a while since I've written anything.

Enough of that nonsense blabber.

One of the reasons I temporarily stopped writing is that I have been in an emotional pit I can't seem to go out of. I've been sad and feeling so lost, without knowing why or how it happened. Or maybe I am in denial. Everybody close to me knows or at least has an idea. But I cannot let this feeling eat me up. And I have my Ane to thank for giving me the balance that I need. Sometimes he doesn't get it but even so, he puts up with me and just shuts up. And it helps that he demands we pray together before we sleep. At least I get to ask Him to take away all my worries and pains.

{On trying}

to get pregnant, I realized it's not as easy as it seemed. We've been married for six months now and I just had my period. The morning it arrived, I was cramping. I was too weak to stand up because I didn't want to face the truth. I cried. The same way I would cry for the last five months. My family and friends have advised me to stop pressuring myself and just relax. Oh well, maybe I am just obsessed with the idea of having my own kids. The waiting game is on again.

{Mommy}

turned 52 yesterday. We planned nothing special because she requested that we not make a big fuss about it. I went to the mall the other day to get the gift but the thing we wanted to give her was out of stock. No luck. Brothers, Ane and I decided to just surprise visit her. We didn't tell Dad because we were quite sure he will spill. Around lunch time, we still didn't know where to go. You see, Mommy has a terrible schedule everyday that even if you set an appointment, it could still change anytime. I texted her and she said she's in Makati with Dad, so great, it's near and we could get there fast. But LBB and Ane were still in school and office respectively so we couldn't just go. Around 4pm, Mom's assistant texted that Mom and Dad arrived in Sta. Rosa already. So we hurriedly left and fetched Ane in Makati. While traversing SLEX, the assistant texted again, saying that the couple left for Tagaytay. Geesh. So we got there before six and waited ‘til 8pm when they returned. She was surprised alright, but we couldn't stay any longer. LBB's got homework to do. I think she appreciated the gesture, though.

Anyway, my Mom is a woman of courage and strength. She's also intelligent and beautiful, looking young for her age. She could get demanding and annoying at times, but that's what she is, eh. I don't think we would all grow up responsible and independent if she's not what she is. It's a package I would lovingly accept over and over again. I should remember to digiscrap about her.

{Reunions}

make me wonder. No, I'm not talking about family reunions (though, the ones with mom's side are always fun!)...but school reunions. I haven't been to one of my own but we recently witnessed a bunch of fifty-something folks get together after 40 years from graduating grade school. Some were so successful, others just weren't lucky enough. While one is now a very rich man looking so young and living in a posh village in Libis, another fends for the family by cleaning and taking trash from a baranggay talipapa, has grey hair & no teeth. Sometimes, life can be so cruel. But I believe that each of us creates our destiny and that we always have a choice. When the time comes, I simply cannot be the seemingly sad individual who looks so old and unaccomplished.




Now this post has become too long, uh? I have lots of catching up to do, but this is all for now. I really wish I could do this regularly from now on. Til next!